Supporting the Bereaved
Losing someone you care about can be one of life’s most difficult experiences.
There are no easy answers when trying to help a bereaved family come to terms with their loss. Every situation is unique and people react in different ways and heal at different speeds. There is no defined time limit to grief.
Friends or relatives are usually among the first people to turn to after a bereavement but there are many organisations that can help you. Your GP and the Citizens Advice Bureau can give you advice and lists of who to call, while the Samaritans and CRUSE are trained to listen and can help people cope with bereavement.
For many people the church is still a great source of help and support, and even if you are not a regular churchgoer, your Parish Vicar or Priest will be there to help and support you. These days there are also many web based bereavement support sites such as www.griefjourney.com.
We are able to lend books to clients and we have a selection which may help. Most dealing with general bereavement, but some specialised for example, how to explain a death to a child, and books for bereaved parents.
We believe that the company has an important responsibility to care for the bereaved, not just by offering support during the funeral, but afterwards as well, especially through the difficult days, weeks or months that may follow.
Our unique support programme is there to help and support you.
‘Our Family Supporting Your Family’
Friends Together
Since October 2007 we have been sponsoring and running Friends Together groups.
Friends Together is not a counselling service. They are support groups which meet over a simple lunch. An informal fellowship where you can be with others who understand how you are feeling and who have also experienced a significant loss.
Anyone is free to join any of the groups, you don’t need to commit to coming every month, just as and when you would like to. You will always be made welcome.
Friends Together meet at:
The Church Hall, St Mary’s Hadlow
On the 2nd Monday of each month
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St Andrew’s Church Hall, Paddock Wood
On the 3rd Thursday of each month
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Curran Hall, East Peckham.
On the last Friday of each month
Please phone our office for further details or if you would like somebody to meet you there
Annual Service of Remembrance
Each year we hold a memorial service at Tonbridge Methodist Church in Higham Lane, Tonbridge.
This service is open to all of our former client families. Many families look forward to coming together once a year to remember that special person who has died.
The service is an inter denominational service and we are delighted that local clergy from all churches in the area give up their time to attend and help us with the service.
The service is followed by refreshments in the church hall.
This annual event is usually in May or June of each year and always on a Saturday afternoon, thus allowing those who work during the week an opportunity to attend. We usually send out invitations for the first 2 or 3 years following your bereavement and also advertise the event in the Courier newspaper. However, former client families are welcome to attend for as long as they like.
Education
Because ours is, in many ways, a death denying culture, many people are unable or unwilling to offer support to the bereaved.
Most people in their everyday lives will have contact with somebody who has been bereaved at some time. Understanding how bereavement effects people and ways in which they can be supported is a valuable life skill.
Once a year we organise and host an education day to which we invite interested professionals and volunteers from all sections of our local community. This usually includes volunteer visitors from churches, Medical and Nursing Staff and Social Care workers.
From time to time the education day may be specific to a group rather than generic and has included ‘Supporting Bereaved Children and Young People’ to which we invited youth leaders, School Teachers and Nursery School staff
We endeavour to obtain the services of well known speakers, authors and academics.
Other Bereavement Support Groups
Holding On Letting Go
Chris Parker is privileged to be a trustee of Holding On Letting Go, a grief support programme for bereaved children and young people, aged 5 – 16 years, who live in Kent and who have experienced the death of a significant person in their lives, most commonly a parent or sibling. Currently, three weekends are held each year. During each weekend programme up to 25 children are offered the opportunity to meet others in a similar situation, explore their feelings and share experiences through artwork, music and play. Each child is visited at home to prepare for the experience and assess suitability for the programme. A follow up visit is completed after the weekend to evaluate the experience with the child in the family situation and to plan future care. For more information please visit the website www.holdingonlettinggo.org.uk or Telephone 08445 61 15 11
Cruse Bereavement Care
Tel: 0844 477 9400
Email: helpline@cruse.org.uk
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Sands Bereavement Care
Tel: 020 7436 5881
Www.uk-sands.org
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Bereavement Advice Centre
Tel: 0800 634 9494